Thursday, June 18, 2009

Journaling

I'm one of the worst ones when it comes to journaling. I can reason with the best of them on why it's good for us. How it helps us to remember what God has done in our lives, what he's brought us through. And increases our faith that he will bring us through the current situation in our life. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it's helpful and good for me. But do I do it? Naw. I'm my own worst enemy. I've done it before. Kept a prayer journal for a couple months, and it was amazing to go back over in just a few months and see all the prayers God had answered. Most of them I'd forgotten about. Even the ones that seemed SOOOO pressing at the time they were prayed. As soon as God answered 'em, I tucked it away and forgot. Now, I'd usually give up the praise right after the triumph, but as soon as things got tough again, where was I? Where was my faith? Hadn't I learned anything? Thank God He is more faithful than I.

Just as I'm sure many of us could say, over the last few years, there have been some really sccary and trying times. Decisions that had to be made, questions that had to be answered, and even some scary situations where we didn't know what how in the world we'd get through them. Guess what...we did. Or should I say, He did. Just recently, a friend of mine lost her 8 year-old boy. It's really brought back many feelings and emotions that I thought I had overcome. But anxiety is a tough one. I know I'm not to be anxious. So right now, I'm lifting up things to God. The Watson family, especially sweet little Abigail; my teenager; our finances.

I'm so glad I started this blog a few days ago. Right now I'm in the middle of a very anxious moment. I went back and read what I wrote about Kaylee and it reminded me of what God can do. Wow, technology is a good thing :) It acted as my prayer journal. And there have been SOO many prayers answered since...and even before. How can I doubt anymore? God, I surrender all to you. I know you are in control. I know no matter what happens, you are working things for the good of those that love you. My prayer is that you would give me the courage and endurance to stand obedient to You, under your protection and blessings. To not get in your way and cause more pain and grief. But that I can just be still and know that YOU ARE GOD.

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