But what about...

Even after 14 years of this homeschooling gig, and no matter how many times I reiterate WHY we homeschool and that those priorities are WAY more important to us than any other possible factor as to why we would put our kids in traditional school, we still get lots of "but what about________?" (insert your favorite school memory or program or reason here)

So that's what I'll focus on today.  The buts.

But what about sports?

Upward Football League

I love sports.  I was an athlete all the way through the collegiate level.  Sports are great for teaching discipline, teamwork, diligence, and many other things.  It's great exercise...which we could all use more of.  So yes, I agree that sports are important.  But homeschooling does not disqualify you from participating in sports.  Most young Olympians are, at least for part of their lives, homeschooled.  There are even professional athletes that were homeschooled.  Ever heard of Tim Tebow or the Williams sisters.  And here are a few more.

In the state of Florida (and many others as well) it is legal for homeschoolers to participate on athletic teams for the school they are zoned for.  Also, many private schools welcome homeschoolers on their sports teams.  Personally, I've found that some of the best athletic programs aren't even attached to schools.  The parks department and a handful of churches host their own leagues.  Upward programs are also available in many areas.  I love this program because it teaches MORE than just the game, it also focuses on sportsmanship and character development.

But what about opportunities like student government?

My daughter in her service committee brainstorming different ideas for her club to serve their community.

OK.  I was on the student council one year in high school.  I think we met three times. And I don't remember anything we did.  And while I'm sure there are many great things that it CAN teach you, as you can tell, it didn't make a HUGE impact on me :)  BUT again, I do see value here.  It's nice for students to learn how to run meetings, to gain leadership experience, to have the opportunity to participate in a governing body and learn about democracy and how organizations like this run, and to perhaps do something together to give back to their community.  But student council is not the only venue for doing this.

My kids are involved in 4H.  When I was growing up in Indiana, 4H (or so I thought) was for farmers.  4H kids showed pigs and raised rabbits and shucked corn. Boy was I wrong.  4H is SO much more than that.  My kids participate only at the club and county levels (they also have district, statewide, and even national events).  4H is a national youth development program.  Think of the clubs as these little independent student councils that are working together to learn leadership skills and serve their communities.  The meetings are run by the students.  The students are elected into office by other students.  The officers set up and approve agendas and projects and events to suit the group's needs and desires.  Meetings are generally held once a month, with events spread out throughout other times. Tell me again what my kids are missing by not being in student council?

But what about dances and other social events?

We even have opportunities for those awkward pics!

Have you read the news lately?  Every year for prom and other dances, there are a handful of high schoolers who leave for the dance but never return.  Not beating down any doors for my kiddos to have a chance at that.  Also, I attended several of these events in my own middle and high school years, and while there were a few that were fun and even memorable, none of them were life-changing.

But again, I do see value in fellowship and social events. And celebrations are important!  That's why MANY homeschool groups have these events as well.  In our area there are annual homecoming and proms for homeschoolers.  Not to mention all the support groups who have beach days, museum meet-ups, park days, field trips, movie nights, skating events, and MUCH MORE.  There are graduation events, as well. In all honesty, there are probably MORE opportunities to socialize for homeschoolers because, well, we work at it.  We are intentional with it.  And because of that, it is often more meaningful. And to be honest, probably a little safer as well.

But what about friends?
As I alluded to in the previous paragraph, there are SO many opportunities for our children to socialize.  We have 4H, church, sports leagues and programs, dance and voice lessons, taekwondo, support group events, and the list literally could go on forever.  But let's talk seriously about this friendship thing.

When I was in school I had about two to three girls at any given time that I would run with.  Did I know more than that?  Yes.  Did the fact that I actually KNEW OF thirty other ten year olds when I was ten add any value to my childhood experience?  Probably not.  Friends are one of those things you measure qualitatively not quantitatively.  It is not about the number of friends our kids have, it's about the quality and experience in those friendships.  I personally don't want to throw my kids into the throngs of the popularity game.  It's over-rated and potentially damaging.

Full disclosure here:  When my oldest was 13, he went back to school for a few years.  It wasn't my idea, but I chose not to fight him and his father on it.  He suddenly had MANY new friends. More than I could count. More than I could know.  Friends who had parents I knew nothing about...whose lives I knew nothing about...whose values I knew nothing about.  Friends who had other ideas about what was right and wrong and who sometimes had parents that just didn't have the time or resources to stop and pay attention to the decisions their kids were making.  And this affected my son.  It affected his perception of right and wrong...too soon. As his parents, we lost even more credibility and some influence because now his peer group was HUGE and VERY different than us.  So while yes, the amount of friends he had grew, so did the amount of drama, conflict, negative influence and so many other things.  Be careful what you wish for.

Still.  Loneliness is hard. There have been seasons when my other children have gone through a time with fewer friends.  It is hard to watch your child be lonely.  But as an adult, we also have those seasons.  Instead of trying to "fix it" for them, if we can encourage our children through these times and teach them that they that will pass and how to effectively get through them, we are only better preparing them for life.  That is our goal, right?  Not happy kids...but successful and grounded adults. I also know that my times of loneliness are often also times of personal development and a strengthening of my faith.  I lean on God more than people.  My faith grows.  There's more time for introspection, for thinking, for reading, for service, and for other things that a full social calendar often interfere with. When we make decisions based on what makes our kids happy in the moment, its easier at that time, but in the end, we pay. And speaking of paying...

But what about the cost?
Yes, public and charter schools are free...in as much as they do not collect tuition.  But you get what you pay for.  Any finance person will tell you that there are more costs than just the immediate monetary ones.  You may not have to pay tuition or purchase curriculum, but what are the hidden costs?

Time with your child is one.  And your child's very own time for himself is another.  Traditional school takes time.  As homeschoolers, we can get done in 3-4 hours what it might normally take a couple eight hour days in a traditional school setting.  And then there is homework.  So they're gone all day, and then they come home with more work to do.  Many will often spend as much time doing homework than you might spend doing regular homeschooling work.  Throw in an extra curricular activity and you might get an hour with your kids a day if you're lucky.  And you'll need to use that to feed them and prep for the next day.

Flexibility is also another cost.  As homeschoolers, you have control over your own schedule.  If you want to take a vacation in November when there are no crowds, do it.  If you need to take off out of state for a month and take care of a sick relative or go on a mission trip, do it.  If you want stay up late and spend more time with dad, who works late, and wake up at 9am instead of 6am, do it. No mad dashes out the door to catch the bus.  No doctors notes to explain absences. No getting permission to raise your child the way you see fit.

When companies need to do something that does not directly affect their mission or vision, or does not involve critical or valuable materials, they outsource.  However, they would never hand over valuable product or intel, or anything they hold near and dear to their vision or philosophy to be outsourced.  This is because if the outsourcing company balks or fails, it can directly effect their bottom line and even have a huge impact on the overall success and even survival of the company.  Our children are the most precious and valuable gift we've ever been given. Raising them might very well be the most important thing I do in my life.  And God placed them under me and has gifted me with exactly what is needed to lead them.  And if there's something else they need, He will provide that as well!  If I outsource this responsibility to someone else, they absolutely will not be as invested as I am.  And that can lead to costs that I am not willing to pay.

What are other "buts" you've run across or are wrestling with now in regards to homeschooling?  Would love to continue this conversation in the comments below and even to point you to resources that can help!

Why We Homeschool

When I first had kids, homeschooling wasn't even in my vocabulary.  I didn't know any homeschoolers.  I had never thought about homeschooling.  In all honesty, I didn't even know it existed.  When your kids got old enough, they went to school.  That was just the way it was.  My first was in daycare and preschool while I finished up my degree and worked.  I was on my way to an MBA and planned on busting through some corporate ceilings!

Then life happened.  Isn't that the way it always is?  Over the course of about six months, God really opened my eyes up to what He wanted for me...for my family.  He turned my heart towards my home and my family and away from the world.  

We started homeschooling after my husband's company transferred us to Korea.  There really weren't a lot of educational options for a 6 year old who didn't speak fluent Korean in a small town over there.  We were either going to have to board him and pay $10,000 for first grade, or homeschool.

My husband is South Korean and came to the US to study.  His host family in college were homeschoolers. They were my first introduction to this lifestyle...a lovely family with strong connections and solid faith.  Mike and Linda made it look easy, so I thought I'd give it a try.  I was completely over-confident.  This wasn't going to be a long-term thing, so surely I could pull it off without any hinges. He was an early reader, intuitive with math and science. Even if we "lost" a year or so, he'd be ready to enter at grade level when we came back to the states.  

Then I fell in love.  All over again, I got to know my son.  We shared experiences.  We had fun.  We fought.  We cried.  We laughed.  We learned.  Together.  It wasn't always easy.  But we were together. That was important to me.  That was important to him. 

I always loved teaching.  When you teach something new to someone, I believe there is an experience created.  A memory.  Those "Aha" moments brought us closer.    

It also made me a better mom.  I could no longer hide things.  He witnessed a LOT more of my life than before.  So I had to stay on my toes.  I learned to be patient, because, well, I didn't really have another choice. This is often an excuse I hear from others as to why they don't homeschool..."Oh I don't have enough patience to do that."  Guess what...neither do I.  But His strength is made known in our weakness.  Patience is like a muscle.  You have to exercise it to grow it.  And yes, homeschooling gives you plenty of opportunities to develop that muscle.  But it is an important muscle to develop.  One we're actually called to develop, so if anything, lack of patience could be a reason TO homeschool.  :)  See what I did there?  

So, while our homeschool started out as a practical solution to a temporary situation, fourteen years later here we are...still homeschooling.  And it has NOTHING to do with where we live. We've added a few students to our school over the years as well.   

We homeschool because...

1. We can.  It is a blessing to be able to do this.  It is currently legal to homeschool in the U.S. and there are MANY opportunities for homeschoolers to participate in different programs, communities, and co-ops.  Our environment is homeschool friendly.  My kids have WAY more opportunities to pursue the things God has called them to because we do homeschool.  We can get our actual school work done in a couple hours a day (as opposed to the seven to eight in a traditional school) and then we have more time to pursue extra-curricular or dive deeper into subjects they are really interested in. They certainly aren't missing out not being in a public school.
2. Socialization is better for homeschoolers.  Seriously.  This whole socialization topic is ridiculous. Schools don't teach our kids to socialize.  How many times in your adult life have you sat in a room with 30 people who are exactly your age and your level to work on something or learn something? Our traditional schools were actually modeled after a Prussian schools system that was designed to indoctrinate students and build loyalty to the new king.  Scary.  Homeschool kids have so many more opportunities to learn life skills, including socialization.  At home, they usually have siblings to deal with.  Definitely opportunity for conflict resolution skills there. Plus, parents can involve them more in the daily running of the household.  They could learn to pay bills, do their own laundry, take care of a home, grow their own food, cook their own meals, even prepare meals for their family.  And outside of the home, there are a plethora of opportunities.  My kids participate in youth sports programs two to three times a week.  We are part of 4H where each of them actually hold an office in which they were voted in for by their club members.  They take classes at local studios for dance, music, and taekwondo.  We also participate in Classical Conversations where they come together once a week with other students from like-minded families who are using the same curriculum to provide accountability and strong relationships as they grow and learn together. They are not lacking in opportunities for socialization.  In our area, the toughest thing for homeschoolers to learn to do is say no to outside activities.  There are lots of GOOD things out there. With co-ops, enrichment programs, guitar lessons, taekwondo, church, field trips, and more...just trust me, socialization is EASY. 
3. It is the best option for us.  Our second son has a learning style that would not fit well in a traditional school environment.  Being able to grow and work with him on his terms has allowed him to flourish.  Four years ago, he would have been considered below grade-level in reading and writing.  He is now above grade-level for both.  I honestly believe this is due to the fact that at home, I did not have to label him or put him in special classes to catch up, I simply taught him and encouraged him at his level.  And he learned without doubting his capabilities or having a crutch to lean on because of a label.  As a homeschooler, all of my kiddos can work at their own level, whether it's ahead or behind.  They don't have to feel the stress of staying with the pack and can pursue things that interest them if they finish their work.  My oldest has been able to spend more time on his passion, music.  And my daughter isn't surrounded by the everyday pressures to fit in.  And all of them get to develop a relationship with their youngest brother who if they were gone all day, would barely get to see them!
4. We spend WAY less time on academics, and get better results!  Instead of waking everyone up at the crack of dawn and rushing everyone out the door, shoving breakfast in our face in the car, only to spend seven hours shuffled around from room to room, then to come home for two to three more hours of homework, my kids get to work at a pace a little less frantic.  They wake up at a decent hour, but if we were out late the night before for a church event or with friends, or to see a super cool lunar eclipse, they might sleep in a bit...and I will get no calls from an attendance office.  We wake up and have a leisurely breakfast, read our Bible, play with their little brother, and settle into some school work.  We get our work done, and we get to do life together.  
5. My family and my kids' spiritual foundation is more important than my career.  I don't mean this as a slam to anyone.  Honestly.  Everyone's situation is different.   I have a degree and have been very successful in the professional field.  I could contribute significantly to my family's finances.  But I do not feel called to do so.  Thirteen years ago we had to bury a child.  That will forever be a part of me and every decision I make.  Time is fleeting.  Things of this world will burn up and be gone forever.  But the investments we make in our children regarding their faith and Christ's love for them will live on.  My children are royalty, heirs to the throne of Christ.  Their education should be that of royalty and it is worth the sacrifices my family makes regarding finances, time, and my career.   

Of course there are many reasons to homeschool, but these are our top five.  It's not because we hate public schools or public school teachers.  I actually commend teachers because their job is REAL and TOUGH.  We don't homeschool because we're elitist, thinking we're better than anyone who doesn't homeschool.  It's a choice we've made.  It's not easy every day.  Some days and months and years are hard.  But the pay-off is immeasurable.  

Choices

Life is full of choices.  Sometimes we want to blame others for the situations we are in, but often, they're simply a result of choices we've made.  Of course there are the obvious times when we screw up and have to deal with the consequences.  You hurt someone = lost relationship.  You spend to much money = too much debt.  You stay up late = you're tired the next day, can't think clearly, and often end up making more bad choices that lead to even more consequences. But sometimes, even the good choices we make can lead to consequences.

We call it sacrifice.  That's a nice word.  We like to think of ourselves as sacrificing for the good of others...especially mothers.  I've made many choices as a mother.  With my first, I chose to work outside the home.  I really felt I had no choice...I was single, no help from the dad...again stemming from a choice I made.  But in all honesty, I did have a choice.  I could have gone into the system, lived in subsidized housing and off the government, or my family.  And to a point I did rely on those services.  However, I chose to work and get through the rest of my college.  I didn't have as much of a social life as my friends.  My child spent a LOT of time with grandparents, which I'm grateful for.  But it was hard to be away from him, and eventually, I quit an amazing job at Toyota because I just couldn't stand having other people raise my child.  My choice.

I took a job at a social work agency.  LOVED what I was doing.  Felt like I was really helping people.  And I still got off in time to spend quality time with my kiddo.  But it wasn't all roses.  Our income dropped drastically.  Debt incurred.  Stress developed.  And frustration set in.  I began looking for another job and landed a great position at a community college being a part-time instructor.  The hours were better and so was the pay.  And, I love teaching...still felt like I was helping people.  My kid was in a good school. I had another baby.  Life was good.

Funny how life events change our perspective.

When she was three months old, we lost our second child.  It was sudden and unexpected.  And of course, had a profound effect on me.  I realized how short life is and how precious our children are.  I wanted to dedicate my life to them.  God had given them to me as a gift.  He had placed them in my care and I wanted to give them the very best of me.

When I was growing up, I always had notions of being a strong working mom.  I watched my mom do it and had so much respect for her.  My dream was to have a successful career.  I had a real drive and ambition. I planned on going back to school, getting my MBA, and blowing the heck out of those glass ceilings!  Never did I consider being a stay-at-home mom.  Thought never even crossed my mind.  Ever.  That's why I know it had to come from God.  He changed my heart.  He turned it toward my family.  Then He provided a way.

I wanted to bless my family with all of me.  And my arms that had ached for another baby after our loss, now wanted to have a house FULL of them!  God placed women in my life that had the same calling who taught me a lot.  We began homeschooling.  And I LOVED it.  I had always loved teaching.  There's a connection created between teacher and student when something is learned.  That connection is magnified and so much more special when it's your own child.  I don't profess that parents who don't homeschool are bad parents. I think it's a choice we make.  And I thank God for allowing it to be an option for us.  We revisit the decision often and if we're ever called away from it, then we'll follow God.

Our oldest is now in school.  I question this decision often, but am trusting God has a purpose and a plan for him. He's been able to reach out and invite MANY of his school friends to church.  Perhaps that is why God has him there now.  But I'm glad we were able to pour into him in the beginning so he could have a more solid foundation. Or perhaps God was using our first child to prepare me for our third...who would seriously struggle in a traditional school setting.  But none of that matters.  We were prepared to meet his needs and continue on with our homeschooling, knowing that God is providing the best for him through a loving and non-threatening learning environment.  A place he can learn his way and be encouraged, not judged and compared.  Again, there may come a time when God has him in school, but until then, we feel strongly that this is what God wants for our family.

This is what we choose. So what is the sacrifice?  That corporate driven side of me has to be held in check a lot.  It will rear it's ugly head and cry, "What about me? I can do that!  I want to be involved in that!"  I want to be successful in what I do.  I admit it, I want to be respected and valued.  Sometimes, people look at me and see only this stay-at home mom who's homeschooling her kids...weird.  :)  They don't know the side of me that has a degree and fought with the big dogs in corporate America.  Or the fact that I've been in ministry for nearly 10 years.  They see only what's in front of them...and often I fall into the trap of proving myself.  Jeesh.  Why?  I don't have to do anything except what is pleasing to God.  Why do I seek the approval of man? Why do I care if I'm overlooked or left out? I've chosen this.  Me.  If I want the other...to run crazy hard after another great mission and vision...I have to let this one go.   And I don't feel God is calling me away from this one just yet.  One day.  Yes.

One day, the kids will be grown, or they'll all be in school.  And then, I can run hard after something else.  Until then,  I have to give the rest a little less.  Right now God has given me this as my priority and I'm choosing to follow and trust Him on it.  He has given me a mighty mission in my family.  An admirable one.  I will not run away from it.  I will not give up.  I will not blame others for the decisions I've made.  I will embrace this season of my life and be grateful for the choices God has given me.  And the beautiful children he has blessed me with.

-This is a re-post that is extremely relevant in my life right now. One thing that's changed is that our oldest is coming back home for school. I don't regret anything. I think God had him in school for a reason, and now he's coming back home for a recap on that solid foundation before he soars off into this world on his own. So blessed to be a mom!

Choices

Life is full of choices.  Sometimes we want to blame others for the situations we are in, but often, they're simply a result of choices we've made.  Of course there are the obvious times when we screw up and have to deal with the consequences.  You hurt someone = lost relationship.  You spend to much money = too much debt.  You stay up late = you're tired the next day, can't think clearly, and often end up making more bad choices that lead to even more consequences.

But sometimes, even the good choices we make can lead to consequences.  We call it sacrifice.  That's a nice word.  We like to think of ourselves as sacrificing for the good of others...especially mothers.  I've made many choices as a mother.  With my first, I chose to work outside the home.  I really felt I had no choice...I was single, no help from the dad...again stemming from a choice I made.  But in all honesty, I did have a choice.  I could have gone into the system, lived in subsidized housing and off the government, or my family.  And to a point I did rely on those services.  However, I chose to work and get through the rest of my college.  I didn't have as much of a social life as my friends.  My child spent a LOT of time with grandparents, which I'm grateful for.  But it was hard to be away from him, and eventually, I quit an amazing job at Toyota because I just couldn't stand having other people raise my child.  My choice.

I took a job at a social work agency.  LOVED what I was doing.  Felt like I was really helping people.  And I still got off in time to spend quality time with my kiddo.  But it wasn't all roses.  Our income dropped drastically.  Debt incurred.  Stress developed.  And frustration set in.  I began looking for another job and landed a great position at a community college being a part-time instructor.  The hours were better and so was the pay.  And, I love teaching...still felt like I was helping people.  My kid was in a good school. I had another baby.  Life was good.

Funny how life events change our perspective.  When she was three months old, we lost our second child.  It was sudden and unexpected.  And of course, had a profound effect on me.  I realized how short life is and how precious our children are.  I wanted to dedicate my life to them.  God had given them to me as a gift.  He had placed them in my care and I wanted to give them the very best of me.

When I was growing up, I always had notions of being a strong working mom.  I watched my mom do it and had so much respect for her.  My dream was to have a successful career.  I had a real drive and ambition. I planned on going back to school, getting my MBA, and blowing the heck out of those glass ceilings!  Never did I consider being a stay-at-home mom.  Thought never even crossed my mind.  Ever.  That's why I know it had to come from God.  He changed my heart.  He turned it toward my family.  Then He provided a way.

I wanted to bless my family with all of me.  And my arms that had ached for another baby after our loss, now wanted to have a house FULL of them!  God placed women in my life that had the same calling who taught me a lot.  We began homeschooling.  And I LOVED it.  I had always loved teaching.  There's a connection created between teacher and student when something is learned.  That connection is magnified and so much more special when it's your own child.  I don't profess that parents who don't homeschool are bad parents. I think it's a choice we make.  And I thank God for allowing it to be an option for us.  We revisit the decision often and if we're ever called away from it, then we'll follow God.  Our oldest is now in school.  I question this decision often, but am trusting God has a purpose and a plan for him. He's been able to reach out and invite MANY of his school friends to church.  Perhaps that is why God has him there now.  But I'm glad we were able to pour into him in the beginning so he could have a more solid foundation.

Or perhaps God was using our first child to prepare me for our third...who would seriously struggle in a traditional school setting.  But none of that matters.  We were prepared to meet his needs and continue on with our homeschooling, knowing that God is providing the best for him through a loving and non-threatening learning environment.  A place he can learn his way and be encouraged, not judged and compared.  Again, there may come a time when God has him in school, but until then, we feel strongly that this is what God wants for our family.  So this is what we choose.

So what is the sacrifice?  That corporate driven side of me has to be held in check a lot.  It will rear it's ugly head and cry, "What about me? I can do that!  I want to be involved in that!"  I want to be successful in what I do.  I admit it, I want to be respected and valued.  Sometimes, people look at me and see only this stay-at home mom who's homeschooling her kids...weird.  :)  They don't know the side of me that has a degree and fought with the big dogs in corporate America.  Or the fact that I've been in ministry for nearly 10 years.  They see only what's in front of them...and often I fall into the trap of proving myself.  Jeesh.  Why?  I don't have to do anything except what is pleasing to God.  Why do I seek the approval of man? Why do I care if I'm overlooked or left out?

I've chosen this.  Me.  If I want the other...to run crazy hard after another great mission and vision...I have to let this one go.   And I don't feel God is calling me away from this one just yet.  One day.  Yes.  One day, the kids will be grown, or they'll all be in school.  And then, I can run hard after something else.  Until then,  I have to give the rest a little less.  Right now God has given me this as my priority and I'm choosing to follow and trust Him on it.  He has given me a mighty mission in my family.  An admirable one.  I will not run away from it.  I will not give up.  I will not blame others for the decisions I've made.  I will embrace this season of my life and be grateful for the choices God has given me.  And the beautiful children he has blessed me with.

Unashamedely Christian

Last night a good friend of mine and I had the opportunity to attend and present at a homeschool orientation meeting in Miami. I've attended many of these functions, in many different states and communities so they're a familiar scene for me. However, this one was a bit different. Most of the homeschool communities I've been a part of are Christian-based. I mean, there's a spectrum, but still they were centered around God. This orientation was for a community that is not faith-based. As I listened to the lady present the different types of curriculum I heard a phrase several times that made me cringe: "and although this is a Christian curriculum, it's very good...and again I know this is Christian, but it's still good." She was apologizing for recommending a Christ-centered method. Wow. I had witnessed this in the "outside" world, but never in the homeschooling community, where it's supposed to be safe. I knew from research I had done when we moved here that there were several secular groups in Dade county, but to actually hear someone apologize for recommending Christ, well, something really hit me hard. I could hear her say it over and over again in my head.

I was so proud to be a part of our group, Classical Conversations. My friend stood there and said we are unashamedely a Christian program. The mission of CC is "To know God and to make Him known." What a task we have ahead of us here in Dade county. We are the first group to break the county line. Other CC start-up attempts have failed in the past and we are praying that God will allow us to break through this year.

Our church is also witnessing the same thing. Lives are being changed here in our community. Strongholds are being broken. It's NOT easy. And it's not always fun. But it's worth it. I know that God is moving in Dade county. I know He loves the people of Miami JUST as much as Fort Lauderdale and Montgomery and Korea and Indiana...and I'm just excited to be a part of it all.

First day of school

Today's the first day of school here in Miami. This is an interesting day for us, as we have one child in the public school system and two that we homeschool. This can be a tricky fence to stradle. While in our homeschool groups I'll often hear comments about "those immoral public school kids and parents" and at our oldest son's school events and among those friends, I'll hear talk of those "uber-conservative, rigidly-religious, self-righteous homeschoolers."

The interesting thing is that, like most stereotypes, these thoughts and ideas are so inaccurate. All homeschoolers are not ultra-conservative, culturally irrelevant, socially inept people who want to control their kids' lives. AND all public school families are not immoral, unintelligent, conformists who don't care about their kids. OK, so not all homeschoolers or public school parents/teachers feel this extreme about the opposite. I've been extreme to make a point, but seriously, there's probably more in common than not. Trust me, I live in both circles. For the most part, we all have the same goal and purpose...to raise up the next generation to be the best they can be.

The cool thing about living in the U.S.A. is that as a parent, YOU get to decide what's best for your children. And believe it or not, that might be different for each child in the same family. And it might even be different for the same child at different times in their life. Instead of judging each other, we should be working together. Can't we all just get along?